Wednesday, May 16, 2012

Where My Wandering Thoughts Take Me

Tonight my family was invited over to our minister's house for dinner. While dinner was cooking, they took Little Miss and I for a ride on the golf cart around the neighborhood. While we were carting around the neighborhood and I was looking at all the houses I was thinking about the "normal" sort of lives the people that live in those houses have.

To me, this means everyday the mom & dad go to work or maybe one of them stays home, the kids go to school, dinner is prepared, kids come home to do homework, dad comes home and is greeted by a kiss from his wife and hugs from his kids. They eat together around a dinner table and talk about what happened at school, what happened at work. They spend time together as a family, the kids go to bed and the parents steal a few moments for themselves before going to sleep. Then rinse and repeat, every day.

At first, I was envious about their monotonous, dependable routine. How nice it must be to be able to plan for weeks or months ahead. To be able to depend on dad being there to attend school functions, take the kids to soccer practice, take care of household repairs, and take his wife out for an occasional dinner date. Then I thought about how boring that might get, how they must be so used to seeing each other every day that they probably take it all for granted, they probably don't realize how lucky they have it. That is something I won't have to worry about. After these back to back deployments, my husband and I truly know how important and valuable our time together really is. We also know how much of a waste it is to worry about the small stuff. We know how to keep our love alive while we spend months apart.

How many people get the chance to fall in love with their partner all over again? That is one opportunity that these deployments have given me. We have been forced to prove our love for one another without physical touch. Without being able to pick up the phone and instantly be in contact or shoot a quick text. Our time apart could be the excuse for our bond to deteriorate, instead it has only made us grow stronger as a couple. Hubs has proven to me time and time again that he is just as deeply in love with me as I am with him. And he manages to do that through emails and a handful of phone calls. From thousands of miles away, I know he has my back. He is still my shoulder to cry on, though I do miss his arms swallowing me in a hug.

It was startling to realize how different life is here compared to life in a military community like Hampton Roads. If I would have made this cart ride down a neighborhood street in Virginia Beach, chances are those families are going through a deployment or preparing for one. It is also crazy to think that someday soon, we will be civilians. It will be the start of a whole new lifestyle for us. Though I welcome the day Hubs starts to come home every night and have our kids (yup, that means more than one something we need to work on once he gets home...) tackle him as he walks through the door on a daily basis, I know we will never be one of those "normal" families. We have been through so much as a military family and I thank God for all the lessons we have learned so early on to prepare us for whatever lies ahead.

I love my sailor so much and I think about him all the time. Even at seemingly mundane time like a golf cart ride through suburbia, my thoughts always seem to come back to him. 


  1. I was talking with another spouse about this the other day. I love that being apart really makes you appreciate them more. Military families don't have the time to take each other for granted.

    1. When you have to be apart, it really helps to find a positive way to deal with it!