Monday, December 6, 2010

A Tale of Two Rings

Today has not been the best of days...Little Miss was not so happy today and I did more Christmas shopping. I consider myself extremely lucky because normally she has a very sweet personality and is quite easygoing. I guess if I were cutting teeth, going through a growth spurt, and going through Daddy withdrawals I'd be unhappy too. Her Daddy withdrawals usually hit around Day 3 and then wane from there. On the plus side of my day, I only have 3 gifts left to buy! One of them I have to get by the end of the week but the other 2 can wait until next paycheck. Phew! While I was out shopping today, I got a more than normal amount of compliments about my wedding ring. No, I'm not bragging. Its just my wedding ring isn't your average ring because it has sapphires on it and people notice it; Especially this time of the year when people are out jewelry shopping! So with a day like today, I decided blogging about my wedding rings would help put my bad day out of my mind and remind me to look at the bigger picture.

When you find out one of your friends is engaged, what is (generally) the first question thing you ask? LET ME SEE THE RING!! Then comes the "ooohs" and "ahhhs", its so pretty, its so sparkly! Usually that is where the ring conversation ends. The ring I was proposed to with was not brand new. My husband didn't nervously go into a jewelry store and spent his life savings on a ring. My ring is a "hand me down", but to me this makes it that much more special. My ring belonged to a very special person that I will never get to meet. Her life ended tragically before I came into my husbands life. She was a restaurant manager and her life ended at the hands of a disgruntled employee. I don't know much about her because it is still so hard for my husband to talk about. From what I do know, she was extremely kind, loving, and devoted. She was my brother-in-laws wife and my husbands best friend. The very few occasions I have been able to get my hubs to open up about her, I can see the love and hurt in his eyes. You know how they say that the eyes are the window to the soul? I believe this. I can see he really truly loved her and I doubt he will ever really get over the loss. So when he proposed to me, I think I was in more shock because he was giving me HER ring. And as coincidence would have it, sapphires are my birthstone and I think they were her birthstones as well.This is the ring I wear on my left hand.

On my right hand, I wear the wedding ring that belonged to my husbands birth mother. Her light dimmed long before the world was ready for it to go out. She passed away when my husband was an infant so all he knows about her is from pictures and stories. She was beautiful. I'm not just saying this because its rude to speak ill of the dead, she was really beautiful. She had a smile that looked like it would light up a room. That is something she passed on to her son. This Thanksgiving my hubs "mom" (he was taken in by his maternal grandparents) gave us a big bin of pictures of her. Little Miss has her eyes. We couldn't figure out where they came from but now we know. This ring was given to me very shortly after we were engaged. We were going to try to figure out a way to make it into a necklace, but we've decided to keep it a ring. I want to pass it down to Little Miss one day. 

To me, my rings are not just props used in a ceremony or part of a custom in western civilization. They mean as much to me as my marriage does. When I look down at my hands or whenever I spin these rings out of nervous habit, I'm reminded of the amazing women that are no longer here and it makes me want to make up for the lives they missed. I know they are looking down on my husband every day; I know they are both his guardian angels. Wearing these rings reminds me that I should strive to be the best person I can be. If I don't, in a way I'm dishonoring their memory. It puts a bit of responsibility on my shoulders because not only would I let my husband down, I would let down his entire family. 

I hope everyone has a great week and I hope you have someone warm to cuddle up to!

1 comment:

  1. this post and your rings are beautiful. This made me a little teary eyed. :)